Navigating The First Year After A Divorce

This is a collaborative post

A divorce is a fairly sizeable and impactful event in just about anyone’s life. While getting through it might seem like quite the challenge in itself, things aren’t going to get back to normal when it’s all done. There may be impacts, but noticeable and subtle that you have to deal with, and as such, it’s a good idea to focus on what you can do to manage in that first year, setting yourself up for a healthier future.

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Beginning To Heal Emotionally

Your emotions may have been on a rollercoaster during the divorce, and, indeed, that ride isn’t going to pull to a stop just because the paperwork is all signed and the legal process is done. Allow yourself space to grieve, reflect, and rebuild. Therapy or support groups can be powerful tools for processing anger, guilt, or sadness. Journaling your thoughts or engaging in mindfulness practices helps anchor your emotions. You may also want to avoid the mistake of jumping into relationships too early. Take the time to rediscover your identity outside of your romantic entanglements for a while.

Find Your New Routine

Things can be very up in the air during divorce proceedings, so now is the time to get grounded with it. Re-establishing a consistent routine is vital, especially if you have children. Rebuild your routines around work, meals, school, as well as self-care and family activities. Be proactive in integrating new changes, such as designated co-parenting days, so that you anticipate them and get ready in advance, rather than feeling like they sneak up on you every time they happen. Building a reliable, predictable routine can help greatly reduce stress.

Keep In Touch With Your Lawyer

You may make the mistake of thinking that you don’t need your lawyer once the divorce is done, but that’s not necessarily true. If there are children involved, then you’re likely to need specialist support in family law for a while yet. Custody agreements, visitation schedules, and child support arrangements may continue to need work, especially as things change, such as health issues or educational decisions. Should co-parenting ever become difficult, you may need your lawyer to help you get additional legal protections, too.

Don’t Forget To Check Up On The Kids

If you’re being affected by a divorce in the year after it follows, then it should be no surprise that your kids are still going to be feeling its impacts, as well. Talking to your children about the divorce and the nature of the family going forward is important. However, it may be important to recognise that they may need support beyond you, especially as your relationship may be something they need to talk about going forward. As such, considering making an appointment with a therapist for your child might be necessary if their behaviour has changed.

A divorce is naturally going to impact you and your family, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t mitigate the effects by being proactive in how you rebuild your life. The tips above should help with that.