This is a collaborative post.
Relationship breakdowns can be long, complicated and hearts get broken. Some people end up getting a divorce quickly, with little time to repair, and for others, it is a slow-burning process that takes many twists and turns.
There are two real ways to divorce. One is to head into it bitter and attack the other side. Going after things that are not only rightful yours but things that really should belong to the other partner too. It’s harsh and can cause a lot of pain on both sides.
Even when things get tough, there are ways to make sure that you aren’t the one who is missing out, fhdra, child support, visitation rights and more can protect you.
Or you can enter the proceedings as amicably as possible. Sometimes, when we are hurt we want to cause the other person pain. That leads to a longer and more complicated process, more broken hearts, and arguments over cents and pennies.
How can you move forward amicably?
Remember that your mental health and wellbeing are just as important as ensuring that you get what you have put into the relationship. So how can you have an amicable split?
Your future matters, and even in the middle of arguments and divorce you have a future. Think about if you would be proud of the person you are being right now.
Your relationship as you know it now is already in the past, and you are now working towards a happy and healthy future.
Think about how you want to move forward, as an individual.
You not only have to forgive yourself but over time you might want to extend that forgiveness to your ex-partner.
‘Forgiveness gives us the freedom to move into your future, letting go of your past.’ – Desmond Tutu.
By letting go of what doesn’t serve us anymore, we make room to grow forward.
There are divorce coaches, and they can help you to make the most of your time during the divorce. Building a new life isn’t something that happens easily, it is something that takes time and you might need help to muddle through.
You might need a coach, or you might decide that a therapist is ideal for you. Whichever you choose, make sure that you are committed to working with them.
These experts will understand where you are now, how you want to move forward, and how to help you get there.
Friends and family, although supportive, can’t always get you to where you need to be mentally and emotionally.
It can be all too easy to negative talk your ex-partner, their family, and friends. But all that does is make you feel bad. If you have a lot of angriness or bitterness, then the chances are you need to deal with those emotions in a more healthy way.
Counseling and coaching can help you ensure you don’t talk negatively about your partner.
Although you might not want a divorce, or you are trying to see if you can work it out, understanding how you can move forward in an amicable way.
Have you been able to have an Amicable Split?