Making Time for Selfcare as a Mum 

This is a collaborative post

Making time for selfcare can be challenging for anyone, but for mothers – especially new mums with babies and toddlers requiring 24/7 attention – it can seem impossible. However, as the old saying goes, you cannot pour from an empty cup, so it’s vital to find ways to look after yourself while caring for your kids. And yes, it’s possible! 

1. Understanding the importance of selfcare 

When people talk about selfcare, images of spa days and weekend retreats often come to mind. It’s actually nothing more or less than the deliberate practice of looking after yourself – taking active steps to protect and bolster your physical, mental, emotional and social wellbeing.  

Without conscious and consistent maintenance, personal wellbeing can quickly decline. And, as a mum, it’s especially important for you to preserve your energy levels before you reach a point of exhaustion. When you regularly ignore your own needs, everyday challenges can feel harder to manage. That can make motherhood and the small daily elements that make it up feel overwhelming. 

Think of selfcare as essential rather than just a reward. Just as you keep the family car fuelled and serviced so it stays reliable, you need regular care to keep yourself functioning well too. 

2. Personalising your wellbeing 

What helps one person feel refreshed may do very little for someone else. A friend might love a busy fitness class after work, while you might feel more restored by a quiet walk, reading a novel or spending half an hour gardening. 

Start by noticing when you feel most like yourself. You may find that a short run clears your head after a stressful morning. Perhaps meeting a friend for coffee gives you a chance to talk about something other than school lunches and laundry. Others feel better when they learn a new skill, work on a creative hobby or spend time outdoors. 

Consider keeping a simple note on your phone for a week and jotting down moments when you feel energised or relaxed. Looking back at those patterns can help you choose activities that genuinely support your wellbeing rather than following someone else’s idea of selfcare. 

3. Doing simple selfcare 

Many forms of selfcare take only a few minutes and fit naturally into an ordinary day. Small habits often make the biggest difference because you can maintain them consistently. Scheduling them in as you would anything else essential to your wellbeing, like meals and sleep, helps them become a natural part of your routine rather than something else to think about. 

You might spend ten minutes stretching before the house wakes up or commit to half an hour of fresh air at lunchtime. Your evening wind-down deserves equal attention. Relaxing with a peppermint tea and a book for 30 minutes before bed is an effective way to prepare for sleep.  

Find ways to pamper yourself that don’t take any extra effort, too. For example, invest in a water flosser for that dentist clean feeling without complicating your personal hygiene routine or treat yourself to a weekly hair and face mask. Rather than aiming for perfection, look for manageable actions you can repeat regularly – and don’t beat yourself up if you sometimes have to let things slip. 

4. Finding time for yourself 

Many mums struggle with selfcare not because they do not value it, but because they genuinely cannot see where the time will come from. Instead of waiting for a free afternoon to appear, look for smaller pockets of time already hidden within your routine and reclaim these for yourself. Dropping your standards can help – sometimes, a warm shower and an episode of your favourite programme should come before cleaning. 

Can’t see any spare time? Speak to your partner or friends and family and reserve a block of time each week to do something you enjoy. Treating personal time as an appointment can help. If it sits in your diary alongside everything else, you are less likely to sacrifice it when another demand appears. 

5. Asking for help 

Many mothers carry an unrealistic expectation that they should manage everything themselves. In reality, asking for support often benefits the whole family. 

A partner may be happy to handle bath time while you go for a run. Grandparents might welcome the opportunity to spend time with the children for an afternoon. Friends can often provide practical help or simply offer a listening ear when you need one. 

Have open conversations about what support would make the biggest difference to you. Being specific often works better than saying you’re overwhelmed. For example, asking someone to collect the children one day a week creates a clear opportunity for rest, exercise or simply catching up on tasks without interruption. 

Making time for selfcare does not require dramatic changes. When you give yourself permission to meet your own needs in small, consistent ways, you build habits that help you feel more resilient and present, better equipped for the realities of family life.